Ahhhhhh

Sometimes it is hard to distinguish reality from delusions.

I have a hard time with that. I spent so long believing that everything was all in my head and that there might be something wrong with me...only to find that it wasn't me at all. Everything i thought was real..was infact...real. Kind of like living in a world and thinking that you're dreaming.

So now I question everything, every thought, every dream, every feeling...and I feel as if I am not living at all. Why can I not trust? Why can I not believe without proof? Why can I not love without question?

I've never felt loved until just recently. But I still question that...love based on lies in noting but a delusion. I can't live like that anymore. I want reality for once. I want it all, no compromise, no loss, no lies, just love..one that is mine..and I my lover's...